Passing Away

Eternal Truth of Life (Death)

📖 Table of Contents

Guidance Before Death:

Family elders have the responsibility to make arrangements in advance for items and services that may be needed at the time of death. These preparations should be made in consultation with knowledgeable family members, without unnecessarily burdening other members with the details.

If medical advice or the opinion of family members and well-wishers suggests that a person's death may be near, relatives living locally and elsewhere should be informed promptly. It is assumed that family members have already been notified about the seriousness of the illness and any hospitalization.

When death appears imminent, the family should also mentally prepare for the necessary actions and responsibilities that will follow, taking guidance from senior and experienced members.

Once a death occurs, close family members, relatives, and friends living both nearby and elsewhere should be informed as soon as possible.

Senior and knowledgeable family members should discuss and decide the time and place of the cremation. A decision should also be made regarding whether to wait for family members traveling from other cities or countries, and if so, their expected arrival date and time should be determined.

Based on these considerations, the date and time of the cremation should be finalized. Possible delays in the arrival of relatives traveling from distant locations should be taken into account. The cremation time should also consider the convenience of local relatives and attendees. The family should decide whether the cremation will take place at a traditional cremation ground or at an electric or gas crematorium.

Before fixing the cremation time, a local contact list should be prepared. Sufficient time should be allowed for people to receive the information and arrive. It is generally appropriate to limit participation in the funeral procession to close family members, relatives, and close friends.

Experienced individuals familiar with funeral rites should be contacted to help arrange the necessary materials for the cremation. The time required to gather these materials should be considered when scheduling the funeral procession. Members of the community who are knowledgeable about funeral procedures have a humanitarian responsibility to offer guidance and assistance during such occasions, whether specifically invited or not. Many people may not be familiar with the proper procedures, and the support of experienced individuals should be regarded as a valuable service to society.

Arrangements for a priest and barber, where customary, should also be made while planning the funeral. The traditional practice of head shaving may be considered in light of present-day circumstances and personal beliefs.

The bier (funeral stretcher) should preferably be prepared by those familiar with the process. The task of securing the body to the bier should also be carried out by experienced individuals.

A copy of the Death Certificate and any advance notification or reservation required by the crematorium authorities should be arranged beforehand.

In some families, sons-in-law have traditionally been discouraged from participating in the funeral procession. However, in modern times, sons and sons-in-law are often regarded equally, and in some situations a son-in-law may play a significant role in supporting and caring for the family. Therefore, it may be appropriate to reconsider such restrictions.

After the completion of the final rites performed at the cremation ground, relatives and friends present may pay their respects through the customary offering of sandalwood paste or other local traditions. Thereafter, they may be respectfully greeted and thanked before departing.

The venue and time for the third-day gathering, prayer meeting, or memorial service should be decided in advance. Appropriate notices may then be published in newspapers, which may require a copy of the Death Certificate.

For relatives and friends living in distant places, expressing condolences through telephone calls or letters may be sufficient. Family members may appropriately encourage such well-wishers to convey their sympathies in this manner.

To help maintain a peaceful and bearable atmosphere of mourning at home, devotional music or hymns may be played. Family members may also organize prayers, bhajans, or devotional gatherings.

After death, all parts of the body are eventually reduced to ashes during cremation. Many organs of the human body are valuable and life-saving. If donated in time, they may help save or improve another person's life. Even an aged or weakened body may contribute to medical research. Therefore, it is a humanitarian duty to consider eye donation, organ donation, or body donation. Individuals should express their wishes in writing and communicate them to their family members well in advance. Family members should also respect and honor the wishes and instructions of the deceased.

Preparing for Imminent Death and After Death:

The following items are traditionally kept ready when a person is nearing the end of life:

1. Holy Ganga water (Gangajal)
2. Curd and sugar crystals (mishri)
3. Cow dung
4. Soil from a Tulsi (holy basil) plant
5. A pouch containing the five gems (diamond, emerald, sapphire, pearl, and coral)
6. Two small pearls
7. Sacred Kusha grass
8. Sacred dust from pilgrimage places (Renuka)
9. Two pieces of cloth measuring approximately 2.5 meters each, washed with Gangajal (or two new sheets)

When a person is in the final stage of life, Tulsi leaves may be mixed with Gangajal and offered to them to drink. Curd with sugar crystals and the five gems may also be offered according to tradition. A pearl may be placed over each eye.

If available, a purified area may be prepared using cow dung. If cow dung is not available, a small amount of soil from a Tulsi plant may be used, and the area may be sanctified with Gangajal.

The person should be bathed, and sacred dust from holy places may be sprinkled over the body. Kusha grass and black sesame seeds may also be placed on the body. The person may be laid on a mat of Kusha grass or a clean sheet with the head facing south.

A Tulsi plant should be placed near the head. If available, pots containing Amla (Indian gooseberry) and Bilva (Bael) plants may also be kept nearby. According to tradition, the presence of these sacred plants is believed to bestow the spiritual merit associated with residing in Kashi (Varanasi), the city of liberation.

Religious and charitable deeds performed by the person may be recalled with reverence. Family members may gather together to sing devotional songs, listen to bhajans, and recite or play readings from the Bhagavad Gita.

(Some traditions place the head toward the north; however, this text considers that practice inappropriate because the feet would then face south, which is traditionally regarded as the direction of Yama, the Lord of Death.)

A final charitable offering of uncooked food items (known as a sidha or dry kitchen donation) is also traditionally made. This may include flour, lentils, rice, ghee, salt, cumin, turmeric, red chili, and sugar, placed in a brass vessel or, if unavailable, a steel vessel, and donated to someone in need.

After Passing Away :

When a person passes away, a fresh sanctified area should be prepared as described above. The body should be placed in the courtyard or another suitable place with the head facing south. If a Kusha mat is available, it should be spread beneath the body. Sacred dust (Renuka) and black sesame seeds may also be placed underneath.

Materials required for taking the body to the cremation ground are generally arranged from outside the home.

A Tulsi plant should be placed behind the head of the deceased, and incense may be lit nearby.

If the hands or feet are bent, they should be gently straightened. If the eyes remain open, they should be closed. If the mouth remains open, it should also be gently closed. If necessary, a red or yellow cloth approximately 4–6 inches wide may be tied from the chin to the top of the head to keep the mouth closed.

In the case of a woman, bangles should be removed promptly, as the hands may later become stiff, making their removal difficult.

If relatives arriving from distant places are being awaited, a line of turmeric may be drawn around the body to prevent insects and small creatures from approaching it.

If the body must be preserved for one or two days until family members arrive, ice slabs may be placed around it to maintain cooling. Care should be taken to ensure that melted ice water does not come into contact with the body.

One or two persons should remain present continuously to ensure that insects, mosquitoes, or flies do not touch the body and that water from the ice does not reach it.

If available, a refrigerated mortuary box should be arranged. Throughout this period, devotional singing, prayers, and recitation of sacred texts may continue.

Panchak Consideration:

The family may consult a priest to determine whether the death occurred during the period known as Panchak, which is considered significant in certain traditions. If applicable, the prescribed rituals should be performed accordingly.

Before the ceremonial bathing of the deceased, tradition prescribes that sons, grandsons, younger brothers, and other younger male relatives may undergo head shaving (mundan). Today, some people choose not to shave their heads, while others may simply trim their hair.

Whether full shaving, trimming, or neither is chosen, the principal mourner performing the rites, along with sons, grandsons, brothers, and others who will carry the bier, should take a ritual bath.

After bathing, those performing the rites traditionally wear white ceremonial clothing consisting of:

1. A four-meter dhoti
2. A two-meter shoulder cloth (dupatta)
3. A one-meter cloth tied around the head

This attire is worn for the performance of the funeral rites.

Preparation of the Deceased :

All materials required for preparing the body are traditionally arranged from outside the home. After the materials arrive, Gangajal is gently warmed in a brass vessel and used for the ceremonial bathing of the deceased. Male family members (sons and grandsons) bathe a deceased man, while daughters-in-law perform the bathing of a deceased woman. The vessel used for this purpose is traditionally not kept for household use afterward.

The clothing removed from the deceased and the sheets used beneath the body are traditionally donated to the poor.

Preparation of the Body (Male)

After bathing the deceased man, the words “Ram-Ram” are traditionally written with Gopi Chandan (sacred sandalwood clay) on the chest, back, and arms. It is not applied to the feet.

Two strips of white cloth, approximately 2 inches and 6 inches wide, are prepared. The narrower strip is tied around the waist, and the wider strip is used as a loincloth. The deceased is then dressed in a dhoti or traditional garment.

A copy of the Bhagavad Gita is placed on the chest, and a Tulsi garland is worn around the neck. A robe made from a cloth split in the center may be placed over the body. A tilak is applied to the forehead.

If available, a shawl or cloth previously offered to a deity may be draped over the body, along with a family shawl. After the body is placed on the bier, the first shawl traditionally offered is from the deceased's in-laws. If the in-laws are present, they may place it themselves.

Shawls from the families of married sons may also be offered. Other close relatives may likewise place shawls as a mark of respect.

Any knots tied during the preparation should be untied before placing the body on the funeral pyre.

After the priest recites the prescribed mantras, the chief mourner (usually the son) places a ball made of barley flour on the chest of the deceased. This is known as the Pind of the Place of Death.

Preparation of the Body (Married Woman / Suhagin):

If the deceased woman was married and her husband is living, daughters-in-law and the wives of grandsons traditionally perform the ceremonial bathing.

After bathing, “Ram-Ram” is written with Gopi Chandan on the chest, back, and arms. It is not applied to the feet.

Two strips of red cloth, approximately 2 inches and 6 inches wide, are prepared. The narrower strip is tied around the waist, and the wider strip is used as a loincloth. A red blouse piece is tied over the chest.

A copy of the Bhagavad Gita is placed on the chest, and a Tulsi garland is worn around the neck.

A two-meter red cloth is wrapped around the lower body like a petticoat and tied securely. A one-meter red cloth split in the center is worn over the shoulders. The body is then dressed in a red sari with the head covered.

If available, a cloth previously offered to a deity may be draped over the body. Traditional adornment is then completed, including:

1. Forehead mark (tilak)
2. Vermilion in the hair parting (applied by the husband, if possible)
3. Mehendi on hands and feet
4. Jewelry and ornaments according to family custom
5. Bangles, anklets, toe rings, and other traditional symbols of marriage

If bangles cannot be fitted, sacred thread (Moli) may be tied around both wrists.

A family ceremonial shawl and a shawl from the woman's parental family are traditionally offered. If a brother is present, he may place the shawl himself; otherwise, a nephew or another close male relative from the parental family may do so.

After the body is placed on the bier, it may be decorated with flowers. Shawls from the families of married sons may also be offered.

All knots tied during preparation should be untied before placing the body on the funeral pyre.

After the priest's mantras, the chief mourner places a barley-flour pind on the chest of the deceased.

Note:

Any jewelry placed on the deceased should be carefully recorded and communicated to a responsible family member. All ornaments should be removed before cremation. Traditionally, it is believed that accidentally cremating jewelry is inauspicious.

In some communities, the expenses of the funeral procession of a married woman are customarily borne by her parental family.

Preparation of the Body (Widowed Woman):

If the deceased woman was widowed, daughters-in-law and the wives of grandsons traditionally perform the bathing ceremony.

“Ram-Ram” is written with Gopi Chandan on the chest, back, and arms, but not on the feet.

A red blouse piece is tied across the chest. Two strips of red cloth, approximately 2 inches and 6 inches wide, are prepared. The narrower strip is tied around the waist and the wider strip is used as a loincloth. According to this tradition, the chest and waist cloths remain red for both married and widowed women.

A white cloth approximately two meters long is wrapped around the lower body and tied in front. A one-meter white cloth split in the center is worn over the shoulders.

A copy of the Bhagavad Gita is placed on the chest, and a Tulsi garland is worn around the neck. The body is dressed in a suitable sari, and a saffron tilak is applied to the forehead.

A family shawl or silk covering is draped over the body, along with a cloth previously offered to a deity. A shawl from the parental family is also traditionally offered. If a brother is present, he may place it; otherwise, a nephew or another close male relative from the parental family may do so.

After the body is placed on the bier, it may be decorated with flowers. Shawls from the families of married sons may also be offered.

All knots tied during preparation should be untied before placing the body on the funeral pyre.

After the priest's recitation of mantras, the chief mourner places a barley-flour pind on the chest of the deceased.

In some communities, the expenses of the funeral procession of a widowed woman are traditionally borne by her parental family.

Circumambulation of the Body :

After the bier has been prepared, the body is placed in a north-south position, with the feet facing north.

Family members younger than the deceased take a coconut in their left hand, circumambulate the body, place the coconut near the feet, and offer their respects.

The spouse may also carry a coconut in the left hand, circumambulate the body, and place the coconut near the feet. According to custom, the spouse may remove personal bangles and place them near the feet of the deceased.

The ritual is generally completed with the assistance of a son or another appropriate family member according to local custom.

Funeral Procession (Shav Yatra):

Whether the deceased is a man or a woman, the bier is traditionally carried on the shoulders.

If there is a great-grandson, he is traditionally given the honor of offering the first shoulder. If he is too young, he may symbolically touch the bier before it is lifted. Thereafter, grandsons and other eligible family members may assist in carrying it.

The bier is initially carried with the head of the deceased facing forward.

The principal mourner, usually the son who will perform the funeral rites, should carry the front shoulder near the head of the deceased. Sons generally carry the side nearest the head. Traditionally, everyone first offers the left shoulder.

If the deceased is a married woman, her husband may also offer a shoulder. Earlier customs in some regions discouraged husbands from carrying the bier or attending the cremation of a young wife. This tradition is considered outdated by many families, and it is regarded as appropriate for the husband to participate in the funeral and cremation rites.

Departure of the Bier:

As the bier leaves the home, the eldest daughter-in-law traditionally walks ahead, followed by younger daughters-in-law and the wives of grandsons. According to custom, they symbolically sweep the path with the end of their sari (pallu) while walking toward the gate.

After the bier leaves, the women offer their respects and remain near the entrance, where they receive and bid farewell to visiting women.

Activities at Home During the Funeral Procession:

After the body has been taken for cremation, the place where the deceased had been laid is cleaned by the daughters-in-law. Traditionally, these tasks are performed with the left hand.

The rest of the house is cleaned and washed.

A wooden platform is placed at the spot where the head of the deceased had rested, and a Tulsi plant is placed upon it.

Any cooked food remaining in the kitchen is discarded.

All women of the household wash their hair and bathe. The widow of the deceased husband also bathes and later offers Tilanjali (water offering) after the daughters-in-law have done so.

In earlier times, younger daughters-in-law bathed together at one place. Today, family members often return to their own homes to bathe and then gather again.

The Resting Place Pind (Vishram Pind):

At the gate of the cremation ground or at a designated resting point along the route, the bier is placed on the ground.

The first pind (the Pind of the Place of Death) is removed and respectfully discarded.

After the priest recites the prescribed mantras, the chief mourner places a second barley-flour pind on the chest of the deceased. This is known as the Vishram Pind (Resting Place Pind).

At this stage, the direction of the bier is reversed so that the feet of the deceased face forward and the head faces behind.

Those who previously carried the front shoulder move to the rear, while those who carried the rear shoulder move to the front.

Arrival at the Cremation Ground:

Upon reaching the cremation ground and before placing the body on the funeral pyre, the Vishram Pind is removed.

Following the priest's recitation of mantras, the chief mourner places a third pind made from black gram (urad) flour on the chest of the deceased. This is known as the Chita Pind (Funeral Pyre Pind).

Tilanjali (Offering of Water and Sesame Seeds):

After bathing, family members gather outside the home.

A brass tray and a vessel filled with water are prepared. Kusha grass, barley, and sesame seeds are placed in the water.

Each participant offers water into the tray and then sits together for the mourning gathering.

While offering Tilanjali, the following traditional prayer is recited:

“Today, I, (state your gotra and name), offer this water mixed with sesame seeds to (name of the departed soul), for the relief of the heat and thirst arising from cremation. May this offering reach and benefit the departed soul.”

For ten days, Tilanjali is offered each morning while facing south.

Those who wear the sacred thread traditionally place it over the right shoulder in the mourning position (Apasavya). Kusha grass, sesame seeds, and water are taken into both hands, the prayer is recited, and the offering is released toward the right side.

For each additional offering, fresh water, sesame seeds, and Kusha grass are taken, and the prayer is repeated.

Cooking in the House After Cremation:

The kitchen fire is traditionally lit only after the family members return from the cremation ground.

Until then, no food is prepared in the home.

According to custom, provisions such as:

1. Rice
2. Lentils
3. Ghee
4. Sugar
5. Salt
6. Flour
7. Spices

are often supplied by the families of the sons' in-laws.

On this day, turmeric is traditionally not used in cooking.

In many places today, relatives send prepared meals instead of raw ingredients. If close relatives are not available locally, arrangements for food may be made through friends, neighbors, or community members.

Preparation for Collection and Immersion of Ashes (Asthi-Sanchay and Asthi-Visarjan):

Traditional items prepared for these rites include:/p>

For a Male Deceased

1. Dhoti
2. Upper garment (Chola)
3. Vest
4. Towel
5. Handkerchief
6. Gold ring
7. Silver vessel
8. Soap
9. Oil
10. Shaving kit
11. Powder

For a Female Deceased

1. Sari
2. Blouse
3. Petticoat
4. Handkerchief
5. Gold nose ornament
6. Gold ring
7. Silver anklets
8. Toe rings
9. Forehead adornment (Tiki)
10. Kajal
11. Powder
12. Soap
13. Oil

These items are used in connection with the subsequent rites of collecting and immersing the ashes.

After Passing Away :

When a person passes away, family members and close friends living locally and elsewhere should be informed as soon as possible.

After consulting senior and knowledgeable family members, it should be decided when and where the cremation will take place. The family should also determine whether to wait for relatives arriving from other cities or countries. If family members are coming from abroad, their expected arrival date and time should be confirmed.

The date and time of the cremation should then be finalized accordingly. While fixing the schedule, possible travel delays of relatives coming from outside should be considered. The cremation timing should also be convenient for local relatives and well-wishers. The family should decide whether the cremation will take place at a traditional cremation ground or at an electric/gas crematorium.

Before finalizing the cremation time, a local contact list should be prepared. Sufficient time should be allowed for people to receive the information and reach the venue. It is generally advisable to limit the funeral procession to close family members, relatives, and close friends.

Experienced individuals who are familiar with funeral rites should be contacted to arrange the necessary materials for the cremation. The time required to gather these materials should also be considered while planning the funeral procession. It is a social and humanitarian responsibility of knowledgeable community members to assist families during such occasions, whether they are formally invited or not. Their guidance and support are often invaluable, as many people may not be familiar with the required procedures.

Arrangements for a priest and barber, if required according to family customs, should also be made in advance. Families may also consider whether traditional head-shaving practices are still appropriate in modern times.

If the funeral bier (arthi) is prepared by experienced persons, it is generally more secure and appropriate. Similarly, the task of properly placing and securing the body on the bier should be entrusted to those familiar with the process.

Copies of the Death Certificate and any advance notice or reservation requirements of the crematorium should be kept ready.

In some families, sons-in-law traditionally do not participate in the funeral procession. However, in modern society, sons and sons-in-law are often regarded equally. In many situations, a son-in-law may actively support and care for the family. Therefore, it may be appropriate to reconsider restrictions on their participation.

After the final rites performed at the cremation ground, relatives and friends present may be offered sandalwood paste as a mark of respect and remembrance. Thereafter, they may be thanked and respectfully bid farewell.

The venue and timing for the third-day gathering (Tiya meeting) or prayer meeting should also be decided. Appropriate announcements may then be published in newspapers or other communication channels. Newspapers generally require a copy of the Death Certificate before publishing such notices.

For relatives and friends living in distant places, expressing condolences through phone calls or letters is usually sufficient. Family members may politely communicate this preference to avoid unnecessary travel.

To help create a calm and peaceful atmosphere at home after the passing, devotional hymns (bhajans) may be played continuously. Family members may also organize devotional singing or prayer gatherings.

After cremation, all physical organs of the body are reduced to ashes. However, many organs are valuable and can save or improve the lives of others if donated in time. Even an aged body may be useful for medical education and research. Therefore, it is a humanitarian duty to consider eye donation, organ donation, or whole-body donation after death. Individuals should clearly express their wishes in writing and inform their family members well in advance. Family members should also respect and honor the wishes of the deceased.

Panchak Consideration:

The family should consult a priest to determine whether the passing occurred during Panchak, a period that is traditionally considered significant in Hindu customs. If Panchak is applicable, the prescribed rituals should be performed accordingly.

Before the ceremonial bathing of the deceased, it is traditionally prescribed that sons, grandsons, younger brothers, and other younger male relatives undergo head shaving (mundan). However, in modern times, some people choose not to shave their heads, while others simply trim their hair.

Whether one follows the traditional shaving practice, trims the hair, or does neither, the person performing the main funeral rites and those who will carry the bier should take a ritual bath before participating.

After bathing, those performing the rites traditionally wear simple white garments, usually consisting of:

1. A white dhoti (approximately 4 meters)
2. A shoulder cloth or scarf (approximately 2 meters)
3. A cloth tied around the head (approximately 1 meter)

All materials required for preparing the deceased are generally arranged from outside the home. Once everything is ready, Gangajal is slightly warmed in a brass vessel and used for the ceremonial bathing of the deceased. Sons and grandsons traditionally bathe a deceased male, while daughters-in-law perform this duty for a deceased female.

The vessel used for this bathing is traditionally not reused in the household. Clothing and bedding used during this process may be donated to those in need.

Preparation of the Deceased (Male):

After bathing the body, "Ram-Ram" may be written on the chest, back, and arms using sacred Gopi Chandan (holy sandalwood clay). It is traditionally not applied to the feet.

Two strips of white cloth are prepared:

1. A narrow strip tied around the waist
2. A wider strip used as a loincloth

The deceased is then dressed in a dhoti or traditional garment.

A copy of the Bhagavad Gita is placed on the chest, and a Tulsi garland is worn around the neck.

A simple upper garment is prepared by splitting a cloth lengthwise and placing it over the body. A sacred tilak is applied to the forehead.

If available, a shawl previously offered to a deity may be draped over the body, followed by a family shawl.

After the body is placed on the bier, it is customary for the first shawl to come from the deceased's in-laws. If they are present in the same city, they may place it themselves. Shawls from the families of the sons' spouses may also be offered.

Any knots tied during the dressing process should be untied before placing the body on the funeral pyre.

After the priest recites the required mantras, the son performing the funeral rites places a small barley-flour offering (pind) on the chest of the deceased. This is known as the Pind of the Place of Death.

Preparation of the Deceased (Married Woman) :

If the deceased is a married woman whose husband is living, daughters-in-law and granddaughters-in-law traditionally perform the ceremonial bathing.

After bathing:

1. "Ram-Ram" is written on the chest, back, and arms with Gopi Chandan.
2. No Gopi Chandan is applied to the feet.
3. Two red cloth strips are prepared: a narrow waist strip and a wider loincloth strip.
4. A red blouse piece is tied across the chest.
5. The Bhagavad Gita is placed on the chest.
6. A Tulsi garland is worn.

A red cloth is wrapped around the lower body and tied securely. Another red cloth is fashioned into an upper garment. The body is dressed in a red sari with the head covered.

If available, a shawl offered to a deity is draped over the body.

Traditional bridal adornments are applied, including:

1. Forehead decoration (bindi)
2. Vermilion in the hair parting (traditionally applied by the husband)
3. Mehendi on hands and feet
4. Jewelry
5. Nose ring
6. Mangalsutra
7. Anklets
8. Toe rings
9. Bangles

If regular bangles cannot be worn, larger-sized bangles may be used. If those also cannot be fitted, sacred threads may be tied around the wrists.

A family ceremonial shawl is draped over the body. A shawl or veil from her parental family is also traditionally offered. If a brother is present, he may place it himself; otherwise, another close male relative from the maternal family may do so.

After the body is placed on the bier, flowers are arranged around it. Additional shawls from the families of sons' spouses may also be offered.

All knots tied during preparation should be opened before placing the body on the funeral pyre.

After the priest's recitation, the son performing the rites places a barley-flour pind on the chest.

Note: Any jewelry placed on the deceased should be carefully recorded and later removed before cremation. Responsible family members should ensure that all valuables are accounted for and removed beforehand.

Traditionally, the expenses related to the funeral procession of a married woman are often borne by her parental family.

Preparation of the Deceased (Widowed Woman)

If the deceased is a widow, daughters-in-law and granddaughters-in-law traditionally perform the ceremonial bathing.

After bathing:

1. "Ram-Ram" is written on the chest, back, and arms using Gopi Chandan.
2. No Gopi Chandan is applied to the feet.
3. A red cloth is tied across the chest.
4. Red cloth strips are tied around the waist and as a loincloth according to custom.
5. A white cloth is wrapped around the lower body and tied in front.
6. A white cloth upper garment is prepared and worn.
7. The Bhagavad Gita is placed on the chest.
8. A Tulsi garland is worn.
9. A suitable sari is draped.
10. A saffron tilak is applied to the forehead.

A family shawl or silk covering may be draped over the body, along with a shawl offered to a deity.

A shawl from the parental family is also traditionally offered by a brother, nephew, or another close relative if available.

After placing the body on the bier:

1. Flowers are arranged around it.
2. Shawls from the families of sons' spouses may be offered.
3. All preparation knots are untied before cremation.

Following the priest's recitation, the son performing the rites places a barley-flour pind on the chest.

As with married women, it is customary in some communities for the funeral procession expenses to be borne by the parental family.

Circumambulation of the Deceased:

After the bier is prepared, the body is laid in a north-south direction with the feet toward the north.

All relatives younger than the deceased carry a coconut in their left hand, walk around the body, place the coconut near the feet, and offer their respects.

The spouse also carries a coconut in the left hand, circumambulates the body, and places the coconut near the feet.

Traditionally, a widow removes her bangles and places them near the feet of her husband. She is usually assisted by a son or another widowed woman. According to this custom, married women do not accompany her during this ritual.

Funeral Procession :

Whether the deceased is male or female, the bier is traditionally carried on the shoulders.

If there is a great-grandson, he may be given the honor of touching or helping carry the bier first. Thereafter, grandsons and other family members take turns.

The body is initially carried with the head facing forward.

The son performing the final rites traditionally carries the shoulder position nearest the head. All participants generally begin with the left shoulder.

If a married woman has passed away, her husband may also participate in carrying the bier. Earlier customs in some regions discouraged this, but modern practice increasingly recognizes the husband's role in accompanying and honoring his spouse during her final journey.

The funeral procession then proceeds toward the cremation ground while family members and relatives accompany the deceased with prayers and respect.

Departure of the Funeral Procession :

As the bier leaves the home, it is customary in some traditions for the eldest daughter-in-law to walk ahead, followed by the younger daughters-in-law and granddaughters-in-law. Symbolically, they sweep the path with the end of their sari (pallu) while walking toward the gate. Once the bier has departed, they offer their respects and remain near the entrance to bid farewell to women who have come to pay condolences.

Inside the home, the place where the deceased had been laid is cleaned. Traditionally, daughters-in-law perform this task. The rest of the house is then cleaned and washed. A wooden seat (pata) is placed where the head of the deceased had rested, and a Tulsi plant is placed upon it.

Any food that was prepared before the death is generally discarded according to custom. Family members bathe and wash their hair. The spouse of the deceased also bathes and participates in the mourning rituals. Family members then gather together.

Resting Stop During the Procession :

At a designated place along the route or near the cremation ground, the bier may be placed on the ground for a short time.

The first pind (offering) placed at the place of death is removed. After the priest recites the prescribed mantras, the son performing the rites places a second barley-flour pind on the chest. This is known as the Pind of Rest (Vishram Pind).

At this point, the direction of the bier is reversed so that the feet face forward and the head remains behind. Those who were carrying the front positions move to the rear, and those at the rear move to the front.

Arrival at the Cremation Ground :

Upon reaching the cremation ground, and before placing the body on the funeral pyre, the Vishram Pind is removed.

Following the priest’s recitation of mantras, the son performing the rites places a third pind made from black gram flour (urad dal flour) on the chest of the deceased. This is known as the Pind of the Pyre (Chita Pind).

Offering of Water and Sesame (Tilanjali):

After bathing, family members gather outside the home with:

1. A brass tray filled with water
2. Kusha grass
3. Barley grains
4. Sesame seeds

Each person offers water in memory of the deceased and then sits together.

While offering Tilanjali, the following traditional prayer is recited:

"May this offering of water and sesame seeds help relieve the thirst and suffering arising from the funeral fire. May this humble offering reach the departed soul."

For ten days, usually in the morning, family members continue offering water, sesame seeds, and Kusha grass while facing south. Those who wear a sacred thread traditionally shift it to the opposite shoulder during the ritual.

Each offering is made separately while repeating the prayer.

Cooking in the Home After Cremation:

Traditionally, no cooking is done in the house until the family members who attended the cremation return home.

Only after their return is the kitchen fire lit again.

According to custom, basic cooking ingredients such as:

1. Rice
2. Lentils
3. Ghee
4. Sugar
5. Salt
6. Flour
7. Spices

may be supplied by the families of the sons' spouses or close relatives.

On this first day, turmeric is traditionally not used in cooking. In modern practice, relatives often send prepared meals instead of raw ingredients.

If close relatives are not available nearby, friends or community members may assist with arranging meals.

Collection and Immersion of Ashes (Preparation):

The following items are traditionally arranged depending on whether the deceased was male or female.

For a Male

1. Dhoti
2. Upper garment (Chola)
3. Undershirt
4. Towel
5. Handkerchief
6. Gold ring
7. Silver vessel
8. Soap
9. Oil
10. Shaving kit
11. Powder

For a Female

1. Sari
2. Blouse
3. Petticoat
4. Handkerchief
5. Gold nose ornament
6. Gold ring
7. Silver anklets
8. Toe rings
9. Forehead adornment (Tiki)
10. Kajal
11. Powder
12. Soap
13. Oil

Collection and Immersion of Ashes :

On the day following the cremation, family members visit the cremation ground to collect the ashes (Asthi Sanchay).

Traditionally, the collection may be postponed if certain dates or astrological considerations such as Panchak, Saturday, Tuesday, or Amavasya are involved. Families often consult a priest regarding this.

The son who performed the cremation rites usually carries out this responsibility, though other sons or grandsons may accompany him.

After collection, the ashes are generally placed in an earthen urn. The urn is covered with a red cloth and kept safely until the journey for immersion takes place.

Before immersion, the urn is brought home, washed with water mixed with milk, and worshipped according to custom.

A silk bag is prepared with a cord long enough to be worn around the neck. After worship, the ashes are dried and placed inside this bag.

The urn or bag is placed on a wooden seat, and younger family members circumambulate it while singing devotional hymns.

The son performing the rites then carries the ashes from the home to the main entrance while family members sing devotional songs.

The designated son, grandson, or brother who will travel to a sacred pilgrimage site such as Haridwar receives the ashes and undertakes the journey for immersion

Traditionally, husband and wife travel together for this purpose. Priests at the pilgrimage site guide the family through the immersion rituals and associated ceremonies. Donations, offerings, and meals for the needy may also be arranged there according to the family's wishes.

Pathwari Ritual :

On the day the ashes are taken for immersion, a small stone is placed near a tree or plant outside the home.

Water is offered to this stone daily until the family member returns from the pilgrimage.

Upon returning, family members gather at the entrance of the home, singing devotional hymns and welcoming those who carried the ashes.

Sacred items brought back from the pilgrimage, such as Gangajal and Tulsi garlands, are placed in the household shrine. These are traditionally opened and distributed on the twelfth day.

The Pathwari ritual symbolizes prayers for the safe completion of the departed soul’s journey until the ashes are immersed.

The Third Day :

On the third day, a simple meal is traditionally prepared, usually including:

1. Moong lentils without salt
2. Rice

Other customary dishes may also be prepared according to family traditions.

From this day onward, the practice of Kagol begins, which involves offering the first portion of food to a crow before anyone else eats.

Relatives such as brothers, sisters, and daughters living nearby may be invited to share meals with the family.

A lamp is lit after sunset at the place where the head of the deceased had rested. The lamp is placed on a tray of earth and partially covered with an inverted sieve according to custom.

Family members continue the daily Tilanjali offerings of water and sesame seeds.

Men and women gather separately for condolence meetings and remembrance.

From the third day onward, one guest (Abhyagat) is also traditionally served meals daily. Separate utensils are reserved for this guest throughout the mourning period.

At the end of the twelfth day, these utensils, along with clothing and gifts, are presented to the guest before departure.

Beginning of Garuda Purana Recitation:

Starting on the third day, a reading of the Garuda Purana or passages from the Bhagavad Gita are traditionally recited in the evening.

The recitation generally continues until the tenth day.

After the reading, devotional singing and prayers are often held for about an hour each evening.

Fourth Day to Tenth Day (Dashagatra):

From the fourth day until the tenth day, a series of rituals known as Dashagatra are traditionally performed each morning under the guidance of a priest.

These rites are usually conducted near a river, pond, or other water body. According to traditional belief, the subtle body of the departed soul gradually takes form during this period and is considered complete by the tenth day.

Some families choose to perform all these rituals together on the tenth day instead of daily.

The offerings (pinds) made from the fourth through ninth day are generally prepared from barley flour. On the tenth day, the offering is traditionally made from black gram (urad dal) flour.

Tenth Day (Conclusion of the Mourning Gathering) :

On the tenth day, before sunset, the formal mourning gathering (baithak) is concluded.

Family members rise from the mourning area, and the floor coverings used during the mourning period are removed. The area is then cleaned and washed thoroughly.

After this day, family members generally stop sitting on the floor for mourning purposes and gradually return to normal household arrangements.

Eleventh Day:

On the eleventh day, the entire house is thoroughly cleaned.

Earthen pots and temporary arrangements used during the mourning period are removed. According to tradition, the period of ritual impurity (sutak) ends on this day.

Family members bathe and wash their hair.

As part of the rituals, each person offers eleven Tilanjalis (water offerings with sesame seeds) in memory of the deceased.

Narayan Bali Ritual:

The Narayan Bali ceremony is traditionally performed on the eleventh day.

This ritual is usually conducted at a temple or another designated religious location rather than inside the home. The priest arranges the required materials and guides the family through the ceremony.

After the ritual, sacred water is brought back to the house and sprinkled throughout the home. Only after this purification is cooking resumed.

A simple meal is then prepared, commonly including:

1. Khichdi
2. Lentil dumpling curry (Badi Sabzi)
3. Flatbread (Phulka)

Family members and relatives are informed once the purification rites have been completed.

Twelfth Day):

The twelfth day is dedicated to the Sapindi Ceremony (Sapindi Puja).

The priest provides a list of required items and arranges for the participation of twelve Brahmins, who are traditionally invited for a ceremonial meal.

Preparation for the Twelfth Day

Traditionally, the following items may be arranged:

1. Clothing offered in honor of Lord Vishnu
2. Silver utensils
3. Gold pieces or tokens
4. Silver coins
5. Clothing for Brahmins
6. Water vessels
7. Other ritual materials as prescribed by the priest

The exact items vary according to family tradition and local customs.

Sapindi Ceremony:

The ceremonies of the twelfth day are generally attended by the entire family. Therefore, relatives and family members are invited to be present and share a meal together.

The day begins with the Sapindi Puja performed under the guidance of the priest.

Following the ritual:

1. Offerings for crows (Kagol) are made.
2. Symbolic offerings to living beings (Panch Bali) may be performed.
3. Twelve Brahmins are served a meal.

Traditionally, the meal for the Brahmins is prepared by the daughters-in-law of the household rather than by hired cooks.

After the meal, gifts and donations are offered to the Brahmins according to the family's means and devotion.

In some communities, larger community meals are also organized at temples or charitable institutions.

After these ceremonies are completed, the family gathers for a communal meal.

Opening of the Sacred Ganga Water Container :

On the twelfth day, the container of sacred Ganga water brought from the pilgrimage site is opened.

Those who wear a sacred thread traditionally replace it on this day.

Family members may also take religious vows or make commitments for future observances, charitable acts, fasting, or other spiritual practices in memory of the departed.

Thirteen Ritual Offerings (13 Pad):

After the Sapindi ceremony, a pledge is traditionally made to offer thirteen ritual gift sets (Pad).

These sets may include:

For a Male

1. Dhoti
2. Upper garment (Chola)
3. Undershirt
4. Towel
5. Handkerchief
6. Footwear
7. Umbrella
8. Ring
9. Silver utensils
10. Religious books
11. Prayer beads
12. Worship accessories
13. Wheat and household items

For a Female

1. Sari
2. Blouse
3. Petticoat
4. Footwear
5. Jewelry items
6. Religious books
7. Prayer beads
8. Worship accessories
9. Wheat and household items

The offerings are distributed to priests associated with family and relatives.

Traditionally, these gifts are sent on the same day.

Shayyadan (Donation of a Bed and Household Articles):

The Shayyadan ceremony symbolizes offering comfort and support in memory of the deceased.

Items traditionally arranged may include:

1. Bed and bedding
2. Mattress
3. Pillow
4. Blanket
5. Clothing
6. Utensils
7. Umbrella
8. Watch
9. Fan
10. Personal care items
11. Religious books and images
12. Prayer materials

Some families invite their spiritual teacher (Guru) and spouse to participate in this ceremony.

A symbolic image of Lakshmi Narayan may also be worshipped and included among the offerings.

Shayyadan Ceremony :

After the Sapindi Puja and the meal for the Brahmins, the prepared bed is arranged with all the donated items placed upon it.

The Guru and, if present, the Guru's spouse are respectfully seated on the bed.

The priest conducts the worship ceremony, after which family members offer respect and symbolic gifts.

Family members then circumambulate the seated Guru and offer their blessings and respects.

At the conclusion of the ceremony, the Guru accepts the donated items and departs with the family's gratitude.

Shaving, Bathing, and Change of Clothes:

Following the completion of these rituals:

1. The son who performed the funeral rites traditionally shaves or trims his hair and beard.
2. Other family members may do the same according to custom.
3. Everyone bathes and changes into fresh clothing.

After this purification, preparations begin for the Pag Ceremony (Pag ka Dastur), which formally marks the transition of family responsibilities and the conclusion of the main mourning period.

Preparation for Garuda Purana Conclusion Ceremony :

Before the Pag Ceremony, gifts are prepared for the priest who conducted the recitation of the Garuda Purana.

These may include clothing, utensils, donations, and honoraria according to family custom and means.

Pag Ceremony (Pag ka Dastur) – Preparation:

The Pag Ceremony is attended by family members, close relatives, and respected members of the community. Since many people participate, it is often organized in a hall or community gathering place.

Relatives, friends, and family members are informed in advance about the date, time, and venue.

Traditional arrangements may include:

1. A ceremonial platform or seat
2. Mattress and floor coverings
3. A copy of the Garuda Purana that has been recited during the mourning period
4. A worship tray containing sacred items such as vermilion, sacred thread, rice grains, sacred grass, and water
5. Envelopes for offerings and donations
6. Seating arrangements for family members and guests

Preparation for Women

Separate arrangements are often made for women, including:

1. A wooden seat (pata)
2. A brass vessel filled with water
3. Vermilion, rice, and prepared henna
4. Napkins or cloths for the ritual

Preparations at Home

Before leaving for the ceremony, arrangements may be made to restore the house to its normal condition. The mourning area is cleaned, furniture is returned to its place, and a simple meal is prepared for family members upon their return.

Conclusion of the Garuda Purana Recitation:

The Pag Ceremony begins with the completion of the remaining recitation of the Garuda Purana.

The eldest son or the person who performed the funeral rites worships the sacred text. Gifts, clothing, and donations intended for the priest are ceremonially offered.

Other family members, relatives, and guests may also place their offerings before the scripture.

Afterward, the principal mourner respectfully carries the scripture on his head as a mark of reverence. The priest then receives the gifts and donations and departs with them.

In some regions, the scripture is ceremonially taken to a temple and respectfully offered there.

The Pag Ceremony:

The priest first performs a brief worship of Ganesha.

The central purpose of the ceremony is the symbolic transfer of family responsibilities to the next generation.

Traditionally:

1. A senior family member places the deceased father's turban or cap on the eldest son.
2. The maternal uncle then applies a ceremonial tilak and presents a new turban or cap from the maternal family.
3. Gifts and envelopes may also be presented.

In modern practice, turbans are often replaced with ceremonial caps.

Younger brothers may also receive caps, clothing, and gifts from maternal relatives.

If sisters are present, they may receive clothing, bangles, and gifts according to family custom.

After this, the families of the sons' spouses may also offer blessings, clothing, and gifts.

At the conclusion of these presentations, sisters or paternal aunts traditionally perform an Aarti for the brothers.

The ceremony symbolizes the continuation of family responsibilities and support among relatives.

Once completed, family members stand near the entrance to thank and bid farewell to guests.

Women's Ceremony:

After the men leave for temple visits, women perform a separate ritual.

A wooden seat is placed with a vessel of water, vermilion, rice, and henna.

Traditionally:

1. Women symbolically wipe their eyes with water using the left hand.
2. Offerings are placed near the vessel.
3. Married women may change into fresh blouses or ceremonial clothing.
4. Female relatives apply tilak to one another.
5. A small amount of henna is applied to the little finger.

Afterward, the women proceed to the temple.

Traditionally, the widow of the deceased does not participate in the temple visit on this occasion.

Temple Visit and Return to Daily Life:

After the Pag Ceremony, family members visit a temple for prayers and blessings.

Upon returning home:

1. Elders are greeted respectfully.
2. Family members sit together and share a simple meal.
3. Visiting relatives gradually take their leave.

Traditionally, close relatives may accompany the eldest son to his workplace for a brief symbolic visit. This act represents the resumption of normal responsibilities and daily life.

Six-Month Memorial (Chhamahi):

In many families today, the Chhamahi (six-month memorial) is performed earlier, often on the 14th or 15th day after death, for convenience.

The date and time are determined according to religious guidance and family tradition.

The ceremony includes:

1. Worship
2. Pind Daan (offering of ritual pinds)
3. Tarpan (water offerings)
4. Prayers for the departed soul

Family members, including daughters, sisters, nephews, nieces, and grandchildren, are invited for the meal.

Traditional Food

Meals commonly prepared include:

1. Kheer (sweet rice pudding)
2. Jalebi or sweet fritters
3. Two vegetable dishes
4. Samosa or Kachori
5. Dahi Vada
6. Puri
7. Chutney
8. Salad

After the ceremony, daughters and sisters may receive gifts and blessings before returning to their homes.

Shraddha at Eleven and a Half Months :

A special Shraddha ceremony is traditionally performed after eleven months and before the completion of the twelfth month.

The date is selected according to the religious calendar.

The ceremony includes:

1. Pind Daan
2. Tarpan
3. Worship and prayers
4. Feeding of Brahmins
5. Family gathering and remembrance

After the ritual meal and offerings, family members dine together.

Merging the Departed Soul with the Ancestors :

After the eleven-and-a-half-month Shraddha, the next Shraddha Paksha (Pitru Paksha) is observed.

During this period, a special ceremony is performed to symbolically unite the departed soul with the family ancestors (Pitrs).

After this rite, the deceased becomes part of the ancestral lineage honored during annual Shraddha ceremonies.

Traditional Arrangements

Depending on local customs, the ceremony may include:

1. Worship materials
2. Silver coins
3. Ritual offerings
4. Feeding of Brahmins or Brahmin women
5. Family meals and charitable donations

The priest conducts the prescribed rituals, including the symbolic joining of ritual offerings representing the ancestors and the recently departed soul.

Afterward:

1. Brahmins receive meals, gifts, and donations.
2. Family members gather for a communal meal.
3. Annual remembrance thereafter follows the regular ancestral Shraddha tradition.

End of the Dehavasan (Passing Away) Section

This concludes the guidance covering traditional practices associated with death, funeral rites, mourning observances, memorial ceremonies, and ancestral remembrance as described in the original text. These customs may vary by family, community, region, and personal beliefs, and families may adapt them according to their traditions and circumstances.